I have burned the top of my mouth somehow and now everything hot that touches it hurts.

We had a nice supper last night at the home of our friends. Another couple was there, and we sat at the kitchen table the whole time. When talk of how I am getting to the city came up and I said I might take the bus, all four of them said I should “make” Fella drive me. I said, “That’s funny, that’s what my other friends say, too.”

I thought, how come I haven’t felt that it’s natural to ask Fella to drive me to the city, since I don’t have my vehicle licensed, and yet all the other men and women I talk to think it’s THE natural thing to do? I mentioned it to him this morning, saying (only a little bit tongue in cheek) that apparently I need to expect more of him than I do; that I will try to be more demanding.

He said that didn’t make sense; I have my own vehicle and driver’s license, and besides, none of those women in those couples ever go anywhere without their husbands, unlike me. What I’d been thinking was that I’m going on what is a work day for him, and can get there on my own steam, so why inconvenience him? Taking a day off costs him money, and time because he has plenty to do. And he doesn’t owe me anything.

What I did ask Fella before now was Have you got anything you need in the city, to make a trip in worth your while? No, he’d said; till last night in response to prodding from the group at the kitchen table, when he said he needs paint or primer that he can’t get out here for some reason. So there  you go. He is taking me in. Easy. And I’m happy about that. I don’t have to ride the bus four hours for what is a two-hour trip in a private vehicle, and I don’t have to license my van yet or worry about buying or repairing tires to get ready for the trip. Petra doesn’t need to book off an hour or two of her Thursday afternoon, during her clinic hours, to take me to the airport. (Not that I couldn’t or wouldn’t take a cab, but she generously insists on driving me from her house and I selfishly let her.)

9:57a.m.

I am a person who is irritated because the water does not come out of the tap fast enough. I have to find things to do while I wait for the cold water to get warm or for the sink to fill.

I am a person who continues to turn on the wrong burner sometimes even after, well aware of this, looking at the control button and considering carefully.

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