makes me look forward to winter








Hi Josephine,

I really hear you, loud and clear, about not being free to go out and FIND someone to be intimate with or do things with when your husband is not willing or able. He won’t or can’t give you what you are asking for, and yet your options are limited (by your choice, I guess) because of the commonly accepted parameters of marriage, which you have committed to. I chafe against the whole damn thing.There are a lot of lonely married people, which I find sad.

Right now my husband is not offering me any loving affection, and I’m aware of how vulnerable I would be to another man’s attentions if there should be one around taking an interest in me. I can see how easily affairs happen when we are starved of intimacy.

In the past I have thought “You refuse to give me what I want, and here is another man offering me his heart; why shouldn’t I take it? Why do I owe my heart and happiness to a marriage or a person that gives me so little emotional satisfaction?”

In the present I am just glad there is no such man around to tempt me and that the man I am with is still the one who makes my mouth water.

So your boy has headed out for Alberta…weather’s fine there in the fall! (Ian Tyson)

I hope he’ll enjoy his time there, but have the good sense to return to our fair province one fine day. Does he know many people in Edmonton? And what will he be studying? I’m taking Sonnyboy there on Sept 1st; classes begin on the 6th. I know I’ll miss him, as I do have a lot of fun with him — mostly clowning around, making him roll his eyes and groan — but it is time he got out from under my feet too. He needs to spread his wings, even if it’s only in the home of another parent. I am tired of trying to motivate his lazy ass off the couch and being resented for it. He’s had a year that most kids don’t get, to loaf around and be unchallenged, for the most part. He doesn’t realize that that is a luxury; instead he feels hard done by whenever he is expected to do anything he doesn’t feel like doing.

Oh I remember having the same attitude when I was his age! I still have it, even, sometimes!

All for now,